Through each step of the process of finding, facing, and using a quiet corner, you will learn a great deal about yourself. The first thing you might learn is how you deal with the process. While there is some instant gratification in three-part, three-breath breathing, most of the lasting and strengthening rewards of spending time in a quiet corner are gradual and subtle. An acceptance of this process will be necessary in order to enjoy the long-term promises.
Your individual approach and your idiosyncrasies will become apparent throughout the process. Remember that there is no right way to do this. Accept your way. If you circle your corner in procrastination before finally entering, accept this as your process. If you dip in and out before settling down, accept this as your process. Whatever your approach is, if it works for you, it’s the right way.
Some of what you learn may not sit well, and you may practice denial as you struggle toward perfection. But we are in process here, not perfection. Many Native American works of art contain intentional flaws because of the belief that only the Creator can create perfection. Keep this in mind as you sit in the process. And practice acceptance.
The anticipation of an event is often more thrilling than the event itself. This knack that we all seem to have, of projecting, fantasizing, and distorting reality, may sometimes serve us well. But it can also be our undoing. The idea of spending time alone may elicit feelings of both fear and pleasure. We may look forward to time alone as a welcome and refreshing reprieve from our hectic lives. But if we take this thought one step further, we may feel some dread about this unstructured time alone, fearing that we won’t know what to do. And this might just keep us from facing our quiet corner.
The simple answer here is this: Just don’t think ahead. While this may sound impossible, it’s not. While it may not be easy, it is simple. Go ahead and reserve your quiet-corner time; then relax and don’t think about it again until you’re in it. Trust yourself. You’ll know what to do. Keep the pleasure and the terror at bay. Simply plan to be in your quiet corner without attaching emotion to the experience before the experience begins.
As you move along your quiet-corner path and learn not to project about your time spent there, you can transfer this new skill to other areas of your life. Plan your next vacation, but try not to predict exactly how you’ll spend your days or how you’ll feel at the end of the trip. Simply make your plans and show up for the magic. Do likewise with other social and work events.
Show up prepared, but be ready for anything. If you can do this, you will avoid disappointment and you will be open and available to the wonder of life and its magnificent treats and surprises.
As you perfect this skill, you will see how your previous behavior was limiting you and how this new behavior opens your world to an abundance of possibilities. While this is all very exciting, remember not to get excited until the excitement is upon you. Then it will be truly glorious and real